It was December 2nd of 2019... I had officially finished and submitted my manuscript for "I Just Want To Design" for editing! I was so empowered. I did it! I wrote a book! I was going to change the lives of florists and designers everywhere! Finally a transformational self help book for designers was about to be released into the world!
Fast forward 6 weeks into January 2020 and I received my edited manuscript back. A Couple of last minute tweaks and my book was ready to be read by the world! The Manuscript was uploaded to Amazon and with a few more clicks it was officially out there for the masses! It was in that same moment my excitement turned to horror. My book is now going to be read by the world... what was I thinking!? I was instantly flooded with anxiety and had a panic attack. My mind raced with thoughts: "Why am I to write a book?", "Who will ever read this?", "Why did I waste all of this time and money?", "I'm going to be a laughing stock" and so on and so on. I even strongly considered just calling the whole thing off, taking it down from amazon and pretending it never even happened.
After a quick pep talk from a few friends I pushed through the fear of putting my book out into the world and sent advanced copies to a group of early readers. The reviews and messages they sent back to me absolutely blew me away! Their kind words were what helped fuel me to keep pushing forward through 2020 even in the moments where I thought it was absolutely impossible to move forward.
So often the thing we want most is closer than we think, hiding right on the other side of fear. When we look fear in the face and keep walking forward, that's when we elevate ourselves to be the person we needed to be to accomplish the goal we were climbing towards. We end up holding ourselves back because we're afraid, unsure, or doubt our own abilities. Ultimately, however, we end up creating our own obstacles to push ourselves further way from our own success.
Do you have a "bucket list"? Maybe even a "Someday when I have time/money" list? If we let our fear guide our decisions, those lists will only keep getting longer as we get further away from achieving them. Even worse, they often become our list of things we wish we had done sooner. If I had given into the fear in that moment (even after putting in all of the work before hand) I wouldn't be anywhere near where I am today. Although 2020 was a year of twists and turns, sadness, chaos and upheaval, there are still so many silver linings that came from it.
You can accomplish so much in just one year if you push through the self doubt and fears holding you back. Make 2021 your year to Be Afraid, and Do it Anyway!
In honor of the one year anniversary of my book and as a huge thank you to everyone who has supported me along the way, I'm having a Book-aversary Sale! Get your very own signed copy at a super special price! Quantities Limited!